failureisntachoice | Mask or Menance IC Contact Post

[ An automated voice speaks because someone hasn't bothered to set up a proper voicemail. The only part in her voice is her name. ] You have reached Agent Texas. Leave a message at the tone.

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From:

bestsword

hey if you're feeling down, I can feel you up

From:

buildsfriends

rrr
rarrr

aaaa o god no

Edited Date: 2015-10-07 04:35 pm (UTC)

From:

fuckai

[Not even gonna preface this with a hello or anything because: ]

Caboose is alone and unsupervised on a fucking beach making friends with jellyfish.

[Please bring up the idea of going to make sure Caboose doesn't get himself killed so Church can blame this on you]

From:

fastballspeciaaaaal

spaceladyspaceladyspacelady!!!!!

i'm a blue team now!! 8DD

From:

buildsfriends

[immediately proceeding this]

CHURCH SAYS HE LOVES ME LIKE HE LOVES YOU

I AM NOT SURE BUT I THINK THE NEXT STEP IS THAT WE HAVE TO GET MARRIED

Edited Date: 2015-10-25 06:23 am (UTC)

From:

fuckai

[You know, he's gone over how to do this probably a dozen times, now. Went through at least two dozen plans that involved chocolates, flowers, even a stuffed animal at one point.

But in the end, this is all that's coming out: ]

Hey, Tex, uh-- I need to get away from Tweedle-Me and Tweedle-douche. There's a restaurant in downtown Heropa, but they completely fucking misheard me and marked me down for two.

[Church that is legitimately the worst excuse ever]

So uh. Heropa. Six o'clock. [.....] Maybe wear something that's not your armor.

[Smooth, Church. Smooth.]

From:

bestever

[a package addressed to T shows up in the mail. there's no return address or sender info, and the deliveryperson just shrugs.]

[the wrapping is just plain brown paper, but the box inside is a gilded godiva box, without the plastic. it's obviously been opened already, and the contents make the reason apparent: a few of the chocolates have been removed, and replaced by trinkets of about the same size. the missing ones are the plain milk chocolates or nougat, and in their place rest three shiny bullets. definitely not edible, but maybe actually usable.]

From:

buildsfriends

TEX HELP
AHH GAD PLEASE HELP ME

From:

bestever

[another delivery, another misshapen package with lazy wrapping and loose string keeping it together. """"anonymously"""", of course. the contents are put together with a great deal more care than the presentation: it's about half a dozen rifles, arranged into some military parody of a french spiral bouquet. the ribbon holding them together is satiny black, and twisted to look like a bowtie instead of a classic bow.]

From:

fastballspeciaaaaal

I HAVE A QUESTION

Edited Date: 2015-11-26 07:23 am (UTC)

From:

bestever

Uh. Hey.

From:

missleadingquestions

Hey. Hey, Tex? I have a question.

From:

fuckai

[After, you know, picking up that some shit went down in Heropa...

Tex will be receiving the simple notification of 15 MISSED CALLS

And... zero... messages.

Look, Church hates leaving messages. One of the many things Blood Gulch taught him is that voicemail systems are absolute bullshit.

But, on the sixteenth call: ]

Tex. Where the hell are you?!

From:

fuckai

Holiday gifts have a $300 minimum.

Exchanges will be on December 23rd. Don't forget, asswipes.

[Please don't hurt him for including you on this present suckering?]

From:

buildsfriends

[The morning of the 24th, taped right to Tex's (guest) bedroom door is a motivational poster by the one and only Caboose, adorned with stickers and glitter galore.

Find attached: a slightly more legible version for the OOCly curious]

Edited Date: 2015-12-23 07:40 am (UTC)

From:

dendarii

[ There's no actual body to this message, just a map pulled off the internet and marked with an X. Somewhere on the beach in Heropa. ]

From:

missleadingquestions

hey tex lmk when you get this? I'm back

From:

missleadingquestions

Hey Tex did you see the news??

From:

fuckai

Where the hell are you?

And I swear to fucking shit, Tex. You better not be running into another pointless war.

[Behold, a moment of actual concern.

... And a good amount of annoyance.]

From:

vorbarra

Tex, Miles needs you to rescue him. Urgently. They're about six inches tall right now and surrounded by a pile of dead guards.

[Straight and to the point, and they can deal with her asking how he knows that later.]

From:

vorbarra

Miles is determined to pay a visit to Lucifer in power-nullified prison in Maurtia Falls, at the RISE facilities. Would you please accompany him and make sure nothing unpleasant happens?

From:

bestever

[If you want it, ask me for it. On a private channel. he's trying not to snoop, he really, truly is. but he's also dragged into tucker's drama, and... well. an invitation is an invitation.]

so uh. the fuck was that about?

From:

glitterateur

[Mabel agonizes a little bit about Tex's valentine-- is it cool enough? Is it punchy enough? Is sending her this thing going to encourage or discourage her from trying to send Mabel to school? Eventually she realizes she's thinking about this too hard and just go with her heart. The card is selected and delivered by pig, with a chocolate bar attached to the back. There's a note written under the candy:

Happy Valentine's Day! I hope your day goes great. Thanks for always checking to make sure I'm alive and offering to teach me how to hit people. That's really cool of you.]

From:

dendarii

[ It takes him a few days to sort out his feelings. Another few days (and lectures) to pin down what he wants to do on top of that ... and how to move forward. ]

I owe you an apology.

Edited (whoops, double posted) Date: 2016-02-13 12:00 pm (UTC)